How to Keep Grandparents Involved After a Divorce[ssba]
A divorce has a larger impact than couples realize. If they have children, the divorce has an effect on them. Both sets of grandparents can also get caught up in what the ex-spouses think is a matter between two people.
Grandparents want to be involved in their grandchildren’s lives, and it’s important that divorce doesn’t present an obstacle to doing that.
Keep the Relationship Alive
While parents might be divorcing one another, it doesn’t mean that the connection between grandparent and grandchild needs to suffer. Divorce doesn’t have to sever all family ties.
The former spouse should reach out to their ex’s parents and assure them that he or she still wants them to play an important role in the children’s lives. This gesture will prevent grandparents from feeling alienated and taking sides in the divorce.
Don’t Place Restrictions on Spending Time with Grandparents
It’s tempting to say that your kids can only spend time with your ex’s parents when they’re with your ex. However, if your ex-spouse doesn’t live nearby or the kids don’t see him or her often, that might mean that they’ll see his or her parents even less.
If it’s geographically feasible, try to schedule visits with your former in-laws when you’ve got custody of the kids. Your children will enjoy getting to spend time with their grandparents, and they’ll appreciate your lack of selfishness when they’re older.
Invite Grandparents to Events
Do your ex-spouse’s parents live nearby? They can be involved in their grandchildren’s lives by participating in events such as birthday parties, holiday celebrations and family dinners.
Inviting your ex’s parents will make them feel as though they’re not missing out on seeing their grandchild. Also, it can make special occasions, such as birthdays, even more memorable for children because they got to see their grandparents.
Put Your Kids First
Your children didn’t ask for this divorce. Although you and your ex-spouse have differences which can’t be resolved, you don’t want to punish them by cutting off their relationship with their cherished grandparents.
To your children, their grandparents are a source of love and support. They’ll need both those things going forward. If it’s in their best interests to see their grandparents, make sure that happens.