Why Ending Your Marriage is Different For Women[ssba]
Divorce is never easy for anyone.
But if you’re one of the thousands of women who get divorced in Canada every year, you may be surprised to know that women going through divorce often have it easier than men do.
Why is that? Here are a few reasons.
Women are More Likely to Initiate Divorce Than Men
Women are twice as likely to initiate divorce as men are. One of the reasons may be that mothers are still favored over fathers in custody cases, and they are much more likely to initiate divorce because men still “behave badly” more often than their wives do, with infidelity, drinking, drug abuse, or domestic violence as catalysts for divorce.
Women Often Handle Divorce Better
Although men get remarried sooner after divorce, women tend to handle the difficult emotions of divorce better than men do.
Women Reach Out for Help From Friends and Family – and Professionals
Women going through divorce usually have support systems of friends and family, to turn to. They also are more likely to seek professional help from a therapist if they need it.
Women Turn Inward to Cope Emotionally
As part of the emotional healing process, women focus on putting things right for themselves and letting go of the past so that they can turn to the future. while men may find it harder to move on.
Women take better care of themselves during and after the trauma of divorce
Women generally focus more on staying physically healthy during and after the trauma of divorce. They are more likely to focus on eating properly and working out as a means to keep depression at bay and prevent illness. They are also less likely to turn to alcohol, drugs, or casual sex – all potentially risky and even dangerous – as means to distract themselves from divorce.
Women are More Likely to Have Financial Difficulty After Divorce
There are also some drawbacks for women during divorce, vs. men. Women are still negatively impacted by the financial ramifications of divorce. While men experience a temporary dip in standard of living, their circumstances often improve markedly after divorce. If women have decided to be stay-at-home parents, they may have to rejoin the workforce after many years out without the support of a spousal income as they would have had during marriage.
Women Often Leave Marriages Later in Life
Although, again, it may seem like men are the ones who initiate divorce, it’s most likely women who do so. Divorce rates in Canada among couples over the age of 50 have been going up over the last decade or so. At British Columbia’s Simon Fraser University, sociologist Barbara Mitchell says there is a reason for this: “The children have grown up and left home, so there’s less incentive to stay together for their sake.”
If there have been marital problems for years, couples can finally do something about it, in other words. Couples who find themselves empty-nesters after so many years can suddenly find themselves with spouses they haven’t been alone together with for years face-to-face – with sobering consequences. They may find they have nothing in common anymore.
In short, it’s not a death knell for women facing divorce. Although there will certainly be unpleasant, difficult ramifications for women after divorce that are emotional, physical, psychological, and financial in nature, these negatives diminish in time so that divorce is seen as a “positive” experience by many – one that lets them move on with their lives in a better emotional place. And that’s something you can do, too.
If you’re facing a divorce, feel free to click the following link to speak to a divorce lawyer.